The future is coming fast,
and it’s here now, which means Ronny Chieng is back
with another installment of Today’s Future Now. -♪ ♪
-(cheering and applause) Thanks, Trevor. Today, our world is in peril. Climate change is on the rise,
and our leaders are uninspiring, which is why,
right now more than ever, we need to come together and drink heavily. I’m talking the hard stuff,
all day, erryday. This entire summer, I’ve drunk nothing
but spiked seltzer, and let me tell you,
it’s the most refreshing way to get (bleep) up. #HotGirlSummer. Okay, Ronny,
I-I think you might have a… a problem with your drinking. No, you have a problem
with my drinking, okay? In fact, drinking is the only
thing going right in the world. But now some tech assholes
are trying to mess it up. Think of it
as an electronic bouncer. One company
is called PatronScan, and it’s used
at bars and clubs worldwide. It scans your information
when you enter the bar. According to PatronScan,
it only collects your name, date of birth, photo,
gender and zip code. Why would you want to give
all that information to a bar? Do you really trust them? Guys, it’s 2019.
Thanks to Facebook, our information
is already everywhere. Even Starbucks
has my blood type. “Cappuccino
for Asian O negative?” Yeah, that’s me. And aside from the bouncers, there’s another thing technology
is messing up in bars, the most important thing:
getting the drink. Ever have someone else
get served at a bar before you even though
you were there before them? A bar in London is using
artificial intelligence to prevent that
from ever happening again. The bar is called
5cc Harrild & Sons, and the bartenders use A.I.,
artificial intelligence, to determine who
is next in line for a drink. The system uses
a facial recognition system to put people
into a virtual queue. Seriously? People need technology
to help them get served? I already have a system
for that, okay? I just go up
to the person in front and tell them
their mom died, okay? Then they run out crying, and Ronny gets his Grey Goose
and Gatorade! Ronny, I can’t believe
you’re lying to people about their moms like that. Yo, listen, Trevor, in a bar, it’s survival
of the fittest, okay? If you can’t get
the bartender’s attention, then maybe you don’t deserve
a drink, okay? That’s how it worked
for thousands of years in the jungle.
It’s called evolution. Look it up. And if you’re a bartender
who thinks all this technology is gonna make your job easier,
well, think again. Welcome to the Tipsy Robot, where the bartender
never underpours, never overpours, either, and isn’t much
of a conversationalist. That’s the bartender. NEWSMAN: Toni the robot
can make 80 drinks an hour, just about any combination
you like, and never gets it wrong. The Makr Shakr gracefully moves
from bottle to bottle, said to be modeled
after the movements of an Italian choreographer. (exhales) Okay, so you’re telling me
these movements were inspired
by an Italian choreographer? (laughter) More like a guy jacking off
on the L train, all right? Also, who cares if this robot
can make 80 drinks an hour? Bartenders do more
than that, okay? Can this robot be my friend? Can it listen to my problems? I need a bartender
who’ll be like, “Ronny, you’re too good
for your wife.” Okay? “Ronny,
let me talk to your wife.” “Ronny, I’m going on vacation
with your wife.” Ronny, it sounds like you’re having problems
with your marriage. No, you’re having problems
with my marriage, okay? Now, if you’ll excuse me,
it’s happy hour, and I think
someone’s mom just died. Ronny Chieng, everybody.