We got these buttons made for the elevator. We’re just gonna… they’re like caps and you just stick them on like that and we got putty in the back. Yeah, we’ve got Braille on it. They’re like legit. So people aren’t gonna be able to tell that they’re fake. That’s where you’re going? Oh yeah. We’re going to the 5th Floor. You working or on vacation? Oh, vacation. Yeah?
Yeah. Yeah that’s fine. Oh, now it’s going up. There ya go. *awkward silence* It’s a new building huh? Seven? Oh. Here, I’ll just got off here. You can stay here. It’s not? Hey Yes sir. Yeah, this is backwards man. What? It was always there. Yeah Oh, she’s-that’s cause she’s coming. Yeah I can actually get to my truck from here. Oh there you go. Here we go. Yeah we can’t guarantee it. Sorry.
*laughing* In the northern and southern hemispheres, you know how they like, the magnetic poles sometimes, because we’re in the southern hemisphere They probably put it on upside down because we’re in Florida, you know, They try to keep you trapped in the elevator so they can get extra money for parking. *laughing* What floor are you going to? I’m just riding and testing it. Oh. Oh, the elevator people screwed up. Mm-hm Yeah, they always do that. You go to a burger place and they have one called the Triple Bypass burger. A burger so good it’ll make you say, “Uegh my heart!” “Call an ambulance!” Do you have the Flooded City Chocolate here? I don’t get it. Melody, how about the Diabetic Delight? Do you serve that here? That’s what I got. It’s my favorite flavor. *wheezing* hUh? What’s u- sorry what? Aw this, this is my jam man. I like it. You’ve never heard this? It’s so stupid too. Gosh I feel like we’ve reached a new low. You never heard of this. This one’s by Smuckers. I actually went to their concert! It’s not on you dude. Look at it. There. It’s like pointing up.
I know! What flavor would you like? Oh, I’ll have the Leukemia Lemon, please. You got the Alzheimer’s Apple? That’s what he got. He didn’t hear me. He had the Hard-of-Hearing Heath bar. What’d you say, the Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma Heath bar? A what? A brownie fudge delight. Brownie. Fudge. Delight? Yeah! Do you just go in the bathroom and crap in a cone? That’s gross. How about you go in the back and let me do that to a customer? No. I’ll have the Adrenocortical Carcinoma
Caramel, please. I’ll have what he’s having. Yeah, that sounds good. We’re going to get some pizza delivered to my house. We’re out and it’s convenient so why not? I’d like to place an order for delivery. Yeah, delivery. Yeah. Delivered. Ross.
What’s the address? I’m just gonna wait here ’till it’s ready and then I’ll just drive home but, Right, no, cause that would defeat the purpose of delivery, so you know, why would I do that? Oh, to have it delivered, I’m saving money? It’s just cause it’s more convenient. 35 minutes…ok. All right, I’ll just wait here. Take a seat. They’re about to leave now?
Yeah. Ok, well just let the delivery dude know that my house is like 10 minutes away, so I’ll be home in about 10 minutes. Yeah Imagine dealing with a blonde dude like me that’s actually this stupid. Serious about it. Oh, there he is. Hey, It’s this one! Just got home. Yeah, I’m doing good. Yeah, just pulled up. Thank you very much. Oh, no problem So convenient man. Thank you. I appreciate it so much.
Okay! Very convenient. Here, I got a tip for you All right. There’s your copy
Oh, I don’t need a receipt. Thank you very much. I appreciate that.
Yeah, you’re all complete Hold on, I actually, actually don’t need the box either.
Oh, okay Yea I’ll be glad to take that back if you don’t want it. Yeah, if you just refund the price to the box on the thing, I’d appreciate it. Thank you very much.
No problem. Alright We just got that pizza so conveniently. Say thank you to our delivery driver. Say bye. Thank you to our delivery driver. Say bye!
Bye bye! When you were the raccoon and you were waving to to the trash truck guys. Hey, buddy. You saying bye? Waving to the white trash guy- I mean the the garbage truck drivers. What if the garbage trucks were white? It’s the white trash guys! Hey, sorry, how do I get to the corner of B Ridge and Tamiami Trail? What’s that? I go straight? Oh, so go straight this way, ok. Don’t worry about recording me, just drive. Alright Chris, now put the camera on me, now turn right, now do a U-turn. All right. Hurry up parallel park, recording me. Keep the camera on me, dude! All right now parallel park in there. Dude, it’s too close. You’re gonna hit him. Yeah. I’m not paying you for the day, dude. Do you want another wing? Yeah, if you don’t mind. the frik did u just do Yeah, Megan taught me that. Thanks Megan. Shout out to Megan. It’s toe lickin’ good! Thanks Chris. It’s your toe lickin’.
I lick your toes? Remember kids, if you see a policeman when you’re driving put your seatbelt on. It’s so dangerous to not wear your seatbelt and it’s scary to say but if you don’t wear your seatbelt one day, you could be out driving and then BAM! Get hit with a fine that you have to pay Then you can’t pay for your electric and then you can’t pay for your water bill, your electric gets shut off, your water gets shut off and you can’t pay your mortgage you lose your house and then you’re feeling down and out one day depressed and you’re driving around town and BAM! You get in a crash and have to go to the hospital all because you didn’t wear your seatbelt the week before. Can you imagine 30 years ago all the fines that people would have to pay just because they hadn’t invented seatbelts? We have it so much better nowadays. Oh dude look No, no, no my finger. I got a little cut. There’s like a scar right here. Yeah?
Yeah. Got’m. He thought I was pointing! What an idiot! Hey look! No, my toe! Like, they clearly didn’t like look that direction. Like gotcha. You thought I was pointing. They’re like, no, I looked straight at your foot. Look! yis look at me but *crazy blonde pretending to open car door* *crazy blonde pretending to close car door* *excuse me WHAT* *blonde man taken a crap IN THE MIDDLE OF THEBEACH* Thank you everybody for not commiting suiside for what i just did It’s my first and the only home that I’ve ever bought. Thank you for coming.